Some of you troglodytes have no doubt been wondering where I have been. Well, much like Bruce Wayne I had to flee the trappings of my apparent princeship. Unlike him, I had to do so at the urging of my legal counsel. Apparently, my legal team needed some time to sort out the age-old legal question: “How 18 was she?”.
Exiled in a far away and exotic land, I was of course recognized for my natural leadership and striking good looks. Soon, I found that I had ascended to yet another position in which I was trapped by my own influence and hemmed-in by those who would seek to peddle it. Just as I was steeling myself to cast it all aside, yet again, I felt icy fingers grip the base of my spine.
Through space and time I heard the agonies of my people call out to me. I ascended up from the darkness into the light. My people needed me.
What threat could be so dire that it required me to return? Something that I could never imagine happening in my quiet and stoic hamlet. The blatant kowtowing to the political correctness idols. Thousands of souls of our GP ancestors cried out at once. Loud enough, it would seem, to summon me back to my homeland.
Now, I am not defending what these idiots did. I don’t know even know why they did it? For all I know they could be making some sort of racial justice statement. All I know, is that they’re stupid and their parents should probably perform a post-birth abortion, preferably with a large-caliber handgun.
However, I will not stand idly by while the great paragon of learning and justice that is Grosse Pointe South High School walks the foolish path of the Social Justice Warrior. The current administration and school board has no right to destroy the bedrock which was laid by countless exceptional students and teachers.
It is time for a change at the helm of Grosse Pointe South and Grosse Pointe School Board. We must oust those who bow before the false gods of political correctness weighed down by their own white guilt. Our children should be lead by the pure of heart and mind. We must purge the heretics.
Till they can be purged, I urge everyone to write and call the school board members and the principal to tell them that we are GP, and we stand united.
You may email the Grosse Pointe School Board Members here: firstname.lastname@example.org or call the central school board office at 313-432-3000.