Fortress Grosse Pointe — I Wish


Once again the proles have taken to the press to decry Grosse Pointe’s intense desire to not burden its already strained tax base by educating the children of its impoverished neighbors. In one such article, imaginatively-titled Fortress Grosse Pointe: In world of school choice, community says ‘stay out’, local muckraker Nancy Nall Derringer likens Grosse Pointe to a fortress ripped from the pages of history and the closed societies of the pre-Johnson administration years. Further, she sprinkles-in veiled allegations that our motivations in protecting our school system from the barbarians pounding at our gatehouses are racially motivated.

Normally, I would not get my madras shorts in a bind over loud-mouthed malcontents, but “journalist” Audrey Spalding had to cast her fierce ginger glare upon the issue and make reckless allegations that our hardworking civil servants are stalking schoolchildren. In her article, Stalking Students in Grosse Pointeshe calls the due diligence our school system engages in to ensure that our hard-earned tax dollars do not go wasted upon interlopers, “extreme”.  While we agree that these measures are a sad reflection upon the neglected state of our neighboring school systems, I hardly think auditing our enrollment is extreme. She finds our argument that we don’t want to spend our $4,000 per pupil local tax money on students and families who never paid into our coffers to be outdated. No, that doesn’t make sense, but communism never does. 

Once again, we are asked to bailout those who have demonstrated their inability to select school board members based on sound qualifications, like not masturbating at inappropriate times and being functionally literate. Well I say, not this time. We have been ask to shoulder too many burdens, to give too much, and receive too little. By Ms. Spaldings own figures, last year alone, we had to foot the bill for 41 confirmed residency violators. Who knows how many go undiscovered, slowly chipping away at our community foundation.

For these reasons, and more, I ask you to stand with me and send our message to the capitol and anyone else who would see our excellence tarnished; we aren’t going to pay your way anymore than we already do. Your school lunches, WIC subsidies, section 8 housing, and many more are enough. We will not contribute to your enslavement in the underclass one iota further. You have sowed ignorance and entitlement and now you must reap your sour grapes. Take your entitlement attitude elsewhere, Comrade.

  • BernieLomax
    In all seriousness though….The Democratic party’s authoritarian experiment on the city of Detroit has gone terribly wrong and now it is simply too late…It’s only going to get worse.

    • BlueDevil

      GP for Life has hit the nail on the head with this one.

  • UoMalum

    Is this site simply an outlet for every isolationist feeling in the Pointes? It’s very funny that on one hand you can claim that children of Detroit shouldn’t be allowed to receive a top notch education (but the city they inhabit should be left to ruin), but make no concession that Grosse Pointe is also a recipient of cash from both the state and federal governments (strange huh). Perhaps you should start taking more dramatic steps and call for a full stop to the influx of state and federal cash, that the barbarians have also added a copper or two towards, in order to completely remove any wants of financial/cultural/ethnic or religious integration of any kind from knocking on your door. But before you do that you might want to skip through your family tree and take an invoice of any cash/help your family has ever received from any form of government, don’t forget to adjust for inflation, and return it (to show you mean what you say).

    But seriously do what you want to do, allow a superintendent to stalk children (I’m sure that looking through a window to find 41 kids that weren’t in district was worth the 200 approximately that were, i’m sure your readers don’t have a problem with that). Allow a city to remain stagnant while the nature of the world around it changes. Allow the apple to rot, so long as the core is preserved.

    Enjoy your patch work pants, comrade.

    • GP For Life

      I didn’t say that the children of Detroit shouldn’t receive a top-notch education. I said they shouldn’t come to Grosse Pointe to get it. As far as making no concession for the state and federal education funding in relation to local funding, our readership is smart and well-informed enough to know that the local piece is just that, a piece. However, as we accumulate more challenged readers we will adjust our writing style accordingly.

      If you want to argue that the residents of Detroit are filling the coffers of the state and federal governments, then you’re wrong. They’re draining them. The median household income in Detroit is $25,787, as of 2010. The only taxes they pay are liquor and tobacco taxes and they take more than that in “services”.

      I could continue to bash your feeble argument but I have grown bored of educating you. Let me guess, you have a liberal arts degree from U of M? Take a lap and clear the bong resin out of your brain, hippy.